Day 89

We got to see a miracle today. Chris met a woman from Arkansas a few weeks ago who's very young son had been diagnosed with two brain tumors. His mother was told by their Arkansas doctor that there was nothing to be done for him. She didn't give up on him and brought him to MDA where a third brain tumor was found. Imagine being pregnant and having to watch your young son suffer through something like this. By chance, we ran into her at the pharmacy today. A stem cell transplant was performed and her son is completely free of tumors and they're going to get to go home. It goes a long way to show how faith and determination can sustain you. I'm happy to report he was more interested in his snacks than the crazy adults proclaiming over him. That's how it should be. I am jealous that he does the bald thing better.

We made some new friends today, as well. We've talked before about how you tend to cycle into the same schedule as other patients. Today, we only saw a handful of people we knew. There is one woman who comes with her daughters and we're constantly running into each other. Last week, the joke was that we were stalking each other. She crochets to pass the time, and I'm always fascinated by what she's doing. Today, she gave me one of the hats that she had crocheted and I absolutely love it. It's furry pink eyelash yarn. I'm addicted to eyelash yarn. I've been learning to knit, and my current project involves this yarn. It is impossible and I'm determined to conquer it. Sad that my world has refined down to ric-rac. She has an extraordinarily rare form of AML and is not in remission. It's another miracle that she made it to MDA. She was told that her condition was usually diagnosed during an autopsy. She's on her third round of chemo. We share the same doctor, so I know she's in good hands.

It seems that Dr. Thomas is a rock star among Leukemia doctors and I will be forever grateful that she decided to take me on. She always makes me smile, even when I'm feeling foul and want to take someone's head off. When faced with her determination, you don't have a chance. I'm tempted to pull a prank just to see if she can be phased.

It's a few days past Easter and I'm happy that I got to spend it on the outside. Round five was harder than I thought it would be. By this time, you'd think that I'd know exactly what to expect. Not so. I developed new side effects, which makes me feel like a whiner. My jaw got sore on both sides. The PA showed a great deal of concern for this today. She continually prodded my jaw to provoke a pain response. The ache comes and goes. I think she's worried about a relapse, but won't say. I'm not worried, since this is a side effect of Cytoxin. The one side effect that I had forgotten about involves Doxyrubicin. It settles into your joints and causes a great deal of discomfort. The weight of my body on my spine is excruciating. My hips and knees also feel like the cartilage has disappeared and the joints are just grinding together. I refuse to take the dilaudid. I'm not being stoic, I just don't like the disconnected feeling it gives. It doesn't rob your mind of the pain. You are finitely aware of the hurt, you just can't do anything about it. I am taking the darvon and that's taking a little of the edge off.

No magnesium today. I managed to keep a normal level on my own. However, I got a baby bottle of potassium. Just can't win. So long as they don't add a potassium supplement to my regimen of pills, I'll be a happy girl. The pill is the size of a mini-cooper and I've heard it bites back.

Since my treatment began, I've noticed that I've developed quite a few new freckles. This didn't bother me so much at first, since it was confined to my face. As my courses have progressed, I've developed spots all over my arms, and chest. Normally, I wouldn't have asked, but since my dad suffered from skin cancer, I thought I should try and figure it out. I asked Dr. Thomas and she told me that it was normal to experience hyper-pigmentation during chemotherapy. She did put in orders for me to get a full dermatological work up in the mean time. Another new doctor, another new set of procedures. All in the name of getting well.