Friday, May 22, 2009

It occurred to me last night, as I lay waiting for sleep, that my personal housing crisis has been dominating my thoughts. Yes, there have been the occasional relapse thoughts peppered in to the mix, but for the most part, I've been focusing on this house.

Here's the silver lining I've managed to rip from the cloud of my discontent: If I'm worrying more about trivial, day to day things, and not about leukemia, then I must be marching a little closer to normal.

I also have to say that my warm, fuzzy feelings for Jamie, our mortgage broker have resumed. I know she's bending every which way to pull this off and I hope she knows how much we appreciate her efforts and tenacity.


Nancy said...

Yeah. You are right. Not worrying about leukemia and worrying more about the house, etc... that's a good thing.

I tell myself that every night when I worry about my boys getting home safely (especially when it's past 1 am.)

There's a Japanese word "Gaman" that means "to persevere" or "to weather the storm." It's what we do in the face of uncertainty whether it be cancer, being forced into an internment camp, house closing crisis, family troubles, etc.

Gaman Baby!!! You can get through this and you will be victorious : ) love ya both, n

Ronni Gordon said...

Temporarily lost the dog today and didn't think about leukemia once. I know what you mean.

Anonymous said...

A VERY VERY god sign and feeling. I am back to worrying about vanity as my football player frame, furry face, and turkey goblet of my neck have me more scared about the mirror than leukemia tests. A good feeling - obviously I wish I did not care about my looks at all and could celebrate 24/7 the gift of life. But somehow the silly things in life sneak their way back as the feeling of a little more safety and security return. It never leaves but it gets pushed back a tad?

Thanks for the honest update that we can all relate to at some level. Keep us updated on the house. By the way, buying a house is not exxactly stress free either! Be kind to yourself!